Kak Faz Fuze :)

Thanks beautiful babe. Luv ya always!

To My Once-cute Friend

You're tall now right? So cute does not really apply to you anymore.

Hey, why have you diactivated your facebook? I kinda miss your posts. They're funny especially your posts throughout Ramadhan.

Anyway, I have quite a shitty day and I don't have nobody to talk to. (That has nothing to do with anything).

Of Nick Lachey, Jessica Simpson and Similar Stories

Know what I'm doin lately?

Every night, I must watch Nick and Vanessa's Dream Wedding. Nick Lachey is from the band 98 Degrees. He is Jessica Simpson's ex-husband. I'm not a fan of Jessica Simpson really but after I watched Nick and Vanessa's Dream Wedding, I feel bad for Jess.

It's been years since Nick and Jess divorced and though Jess said she's happy for both Nick and Vanessa, I know that deep down she's not. Some women like me and I believe Jess too, may show that they're strong but deep down, they are mending the scar that they know will always be there.

I know Nick has really moved on and I can really see that he's much happier with Vanessa but I cannot help but feel sorry for Jess and I cannot help but instilling hatred towards Nick.

I don't know what has happened between them but Nick shouldn't have given up. He should always try to hold on to Jess even if it's hard (you can see that Jess is a spoiled brat).

Watching sad stories makes me emotional. I know the effects towards me but I cannot help but to destroy myself emotionally. When I'm feeling blue, I'd voluntarily watched sad videos, listen to sad songs and just be pathetic.

When I hear my friends telling me sad stories, I would cry. Gosh, I have a really sad life!! I don't know. I just wish I am living a happy life, where everyone's happy. I don't want anyone to be sad. It makes me sad. Hope there's a full stop to sad stories.

ps: Anyway, today's Udin's birthday. Please do have a happy day buddy. Miss ya and I cannot wait to have a happy time with you and the others during convo :)

Today's Boring Story

Kak Farah called.

Catching up.

Missing her.

Hang up.

Bored again.

Continuing life as usual.

Got a wall post from Aslam.

"Abduction".

Cool.

Begins to think I'm phedophile for sure. GOD!

Not Worth Reading

Nothing to update. Life inside the humble abode all day long makes my life not interesting at all.

But, I might as well write something.

I watched BSB's videos lately. I should be ashamed right? People don't listen to BSB. The boys are old. BSB's a lame boyband. They're for drooling teenage girls (though now they drooling over Justin Beiber EWWW). Real people listen to Avenged Sevenfold or System of a Down.

Well, whatever. Don't get me wrong, I love Avenged Sevenfold and System of a Down (gosh!) but I grew up listening to BSB.

Brian's a cutie. He's short and hasn't changed (physically and in personality).

I love my childhood. Full of fun and far from hypocracy.

Anyway, love the BSB. Miss my childhood. When I listened to 'Quit Playing Games With My Heart', I remember that I used to be singing that song aloud in my Year 3 Bersih (primary) classroom. I can still feel the classroom's surrounding.

Oh, it's just me feeling really old.

More boring updates coming (hoping so).

p.s: please check BSB's out. They really are not lame. They're doing their own thing and has been best buddies forever and enjoying every minutes of their lives.

Haih, macam-macam

What is more pathetic?


Only to be noticed because you have plenty of money?



or


Not to be noticed at all?



p.s: speaking from someone else's behalf.

An honest confession, An advice, An unimportant read for some

I had ideas then but it has become a mess now. Basically I wanted to say that I’ve learnt a lot during this break. My mom got sick and she underwent an operation. My elder sisters are quite busy and since I’m still waiting for my posting; I take care of my mom. No big deal. Yeah for a true girl. Not me though.

Let me brief something before I go to the main point of this post. I am a really spoiled brat. I have to admit that. My mom; she has been a rock; no, a mountain for me and my sisters. Honestly (this is a true confession), I have never cook and wash the dishes because my mom wanted me and my sisters to focus on our studies. She never complained. She never asked me to do anything at all. She did everything from the simplest to the most difficult task. And when she was diagnosed with an illness, I began to feel the burden though not as much as she has been facing in making me and my sisters human beings.

It was the simplest chores at first; but then they began to get more difficult (though I have not been to the cooking department yet thanks to my grandmother- oh, she’s a marvelous cook).

I cannot imagine how my mum put up with everything then without a word of complaint.

Okay, here’s the main point of my post. I learnt that it is very hard to take care of the sick. I have never been in this position before. I was basically a princess without the castle and the loving King. Now that I have experienced the reality, I have set focus to life (more to the kind of person I want to be married to – gatai kan aku?)

Sure, if the audience reading this is from the younger generation group, they wouldn’t have really know what I’m trying to say.

Let me put this as simple as possible. Taking care of some sick people is no easy task. Sick people don’t do anything much. They don’t do things on their own. You are lucky if you are taking care of those that can still walk. They don’t smell good most of the time. They demanded things at the most ridiculous times. They make you wake up at 6 am when you are enjoying your holidays. They make you look for things in the trash and wash the whole kitchen when your aunt and grandma are celebrating Raya back at kampong.

So basically, it is not an easy job.

So here’s an advice from a wiser sister; if you are 22 and below, and from someone with new knowledge if you are older.

I am taking care of my mother who I dearly love and who has given her everything to me. So, I don’t feel any burden whatsoever. I would do it all over again if I have to (plus, you don’t want to miss the cute doctors running around looking very intelligible).

Adoi, the advice is not coming out la. Okay, here it goes again. When I was younger (chewah), I look for cute guys, and hoping to marry one of those. And then those with sense of humour, those that can crack me up. Basically those that are handsome la (duhhh).

But after taking care of my mom, I have set my priorities straight. If I can pick anyone for a husband, I want someone that can accept my every flaw. Someone that can put up with me when I’m old, when I get seriously disgustingly sick. Yeah, the ‘love’ that you think can last for a lifetime does not really last. Once you get bored after 2, 5 or the lucky seven years of marriage (nowadays talking), you start doing your own freakin’ thing. I don’t want a marriage like that. Looks is not important. I want a guy that really loves me and no one else. Someone that can take care of me even if I’m having hair loss to the point of baldness. Someone that don’t go for hot chick once he’s a famous goalkeeper. Someone that make decisions based on Islamic beliefs. Someone that loves me because of Allah and someone that can guide me become a better Muslim.

Anyway, the point is, for those that are still not married, don’t go for rich guys. Don’t go for guys with looks. Don’t go for guys that you are proud of to be displaying on your facebook or during Raya where you take him home to show to your pathetic cousins.

Trust me, you won’t be forever lovey-dovey with your spouse forever like during the first year of dating. One day, you’ll get old and all you want is someone sitting faithfully next to you reciting Al-Fatihah or Yassin.

A nice song with a video that kinda sum up what I have been trying to say. Check the video out. Sang by He Is We featuring Owl City. The name of the song is All About Us.



Mushy Feeling Late at Night

Browsing through old photos really brings back memories. I used to laugh my heads off. I used to cry my heart out wishing I’d better be dead.

I found a picture of TEYL 2 with me arm in arm with Hanisah Hafidz. She is someone’s wife now. Gosh, I miss her so much. I miss her laughs.

And then, my closest friends commented on a photo of us. One of my friend reminded me of his Alza and how I miss those moments; when he would be driving his female friends (excluding Zul. Obviously he’s a guy). I love it when he would be asking us out since most of the time, I would be the one’s driving. Not that I mind. It’s just that I tend to be serious when driving. Tengoklah, anak-anak orang kut aku drive tu. When he drives, I can look at my friends when they gossiped. I can laugh till I cannot open my eyes. I can look at the road, the houses etc. I can just be silent and enjoy everything while at it.

Random update 1: Ira’s back at home after 2 days at Puncak Alam coz something that has to do with poor administration there. I wish there’s such a thing back when I was still studying.

Random update 2: I miss my old black bracelet that I have worn for years. I have taken it out for months now for no specific reasons.

Random update 3: When I was browsing old photos, I came upon a picture of an old keychain for my old handphone. The keychain has a letter ‘B’ on it. That was a really old keychain bought by an old boyfriend. I lost it during one of the last days in Penang. I was a bit sad but I thought then that life has to move on.

Random update 4: Mama’s still not 100% well but she still wants to go to my graduation day. It’s just another boring day mommy. You don’t have to go.

Makanan & Aku

Tadi Mama panggil..

Pukul 1.30 PAGI: sayup2 suara Mama: Bazilah, Bazilah..

Aku: pun g ke Mama.

Mama sakit perut, so aku teman dia ke tandas yang berdekatan dgn dapur, yg berdekatan dgn meja makan, yg berdekatan dgn kuih muih raya dan pelbagai makanan lain.

Sementara Mama di tandas, pada pukul 1.30 PAGI itu pun aku melantak semua makanan yg ada. Ada kuih raya yg waktu kecik2 dulu, (waktu slim gila dlu) xsuka makan sekarang sume dh jd sedap.

Ada kek coklat. bukan kek coklat yg biasa. Yg ada coklat meleleh leleh tu. Aku bg perut aku proses jgk.

Dan pelbagai makanan lain yg aku malu nk mention sbb dilantak pd pukul 1.30 PAGI.

Kenapa aku makan wpun melihat Victoria Beckham (inspirasi aku) makin cantik? Wpun merasa seperti gergasi stiap kali balik kg brsama sepupu2 lain?

SEBAB: Aku takut lapar mcm rsa lapar stiap kali di hostel. Jd aku nk isi penuh2 sekarang!

Gila terBAIK alasan ko, Sharifah!!

Wahai Sharifah, berhenti la makan. Kwn2 sekolah menengah ko dlu makin kurus, makin nmpak tulang rahang, dan segala jenis tulang kt muka, ko plak makin hilang hidung ditelenggami pipi yg makin memboyot.

JANGAN TINGGALKAN AKU BERSENDIRIAN DENGAN MAKANAN! PLEASE!!!

Post Ramadhan

Kembali me'lagha'kan diri

Is listening to REM - Everybody Hurts..

Gila lama tak dengar lagu tu. Syahdu. Dah tua rasa (pas tu xsedar diri lagi nak insaf?).