M-M-

I realized that I haven’t written about my mama for quite a long time. I was Facebook-chatting with Hue Ming a couple of months ago and my mama called me for ‘minum petang’. I mentioned it to Hue Ming as I wanted to end the conversation. I thought I sounded casual but she said I sounded happy. Now that I think about it, she’s right. I was happy and still is. I don’t say much now how I miss my mama because she’s here with me all the time now. How blissful.

Okay, the reason I write this, is because I just love my mama. Nothing much. Oh, and yesterday, I felt I miss her though she was only gone to work where I can expect her to be home at about 5. Silly me.

Mama has decided to buy some chicks. When I went to buy the chicks, I didn’t notice anything odd because I was so excited to see these small creatures. It was only at home that I began to learn each chick’s personalities. There are 6 of them and they have different personalities (mama bought one at first). Macam manusia pulak kan but it’s true. So, I realized that this one chick, she’s always sleeping. All the time. When her other siblings and step sister made so much noise and ran away from me who was just trying to clean their humble abode, she slept. But she made some noise once in a while and she ate and drink (though sometimes she dozed off after a few sips of water and in the food container itself-cute huh?). She’s the smallest among them. Although inside, I felt that she’s not strong I don’t voice it out. I laughed it out with my mama trying to act cool. And I know mama felt the same way. One morning, when I went to them to wish them good morning, I saw her. She’s dead. I tried to talk to her but she’s really gone. I was late. I should’ve been by her side. Maybe it was cold the night before. I phoned my mum (she was at work) and I told her what happened. I thought she would say ‘Hah? Ye ke?’ but the first thing that came out from her mouth was her laugh. That was surprising. She said she knew it from the look of the chick. She was not strong from the get-go.

My mama didn’t laugh evilly but she was laughing the easy laugh that she has. I was feeling miserable but listening to her, I feel ok instantly. Mama, you’re special!

One of my earliest posts is about this one girl that has stolen my heart. From the outside, she looks ordinary. But I have never thought that she can make my heart skips, my blood rushing to my face and ears. No kidding. I don’t know how I can describe her accurately. She is the only younger person I’m proud of. She’s like my soul partner. She’s my baby sister that I have never had. She makes me feel like I can be a big sister and not awkward at that at all. And she makes me feel comfortable with my age. Susahnya nk ckp but she is seriously different. She used to run to me and tell me her problems and I felt important. Now that we’ve grown up (kinda), she still asks for my advice. This one night, she asked me and I told her what I would usually do if I’m in her situation. She’s impressed. I don’t even know I can impress anyone at all! Not a big deal to some but such a big freakin deal to me. Just me writing about her makes me jump. SOUL PARTNER. I know I am capable of loving someone. Here is one proof (and another where I love Britney). I know I cannot marry her and I don’t have that tendency. But I don’t love her like my own family members. She’s…………………………………… I don’t even know what I feel. She’s just freakin different. I love her and I’m proud that I can be her big sister! Nikmat Allah terdapat dalam pelbagai bentuk and one of it is through giving me this special girl and I’m REALLY blessed that Allah gave me the opportunity to know her!

Wow, I am capable of loving other people after all. Hehe. Syukur Alhamdulillah for this feeling. Allah is great for giving me these great people!