My Wants.. heee

During the foundation years (like trillion years ago), Diana; said that Mdm Mariah asked the then TESL 3 class, what they really want to do if Islam doesn't pose restrictions on things. The answers from the class are funny and some makes me cringe. But i don't think I'll be mentioning because they would just remember what they want.

I wish I was in the class and be able to answer that question.

For me, I would really want to do many things. I'm not the type that goes 'euww' to saying crazy things (not that I'm against that type of people). 

1. I want to be bald - My mom won't let me and I tried asking my dad but for the first time he agreed with my mom on this one (my dad is kinda don't-care-type of person). What a shocker. So there it goes, i can never be bald. *sigh*

2. I want to take drugs. Coz I think it is cool - enough said

3. I want to colour my hair green and black (jet black)

4. I want to kill people

5. I want to end my life before 19 (not achieved)

6. Pierce my mouth and belly button and eyebrow

7. Of coz make tattoos of my mom's name and things that portray the real me

Yes, I may look disturbing and people might take me as crazy and began to hate me and some may hate me even more. But hey, I'm honest. Let's just don't pretend about who we really are. That is more sickening

And yes, I don't have anything to do (explaining why I'm writing this) despite the exam coming close and haunting my life right now.

A trip to Tesco

I have nothing better to write. I write best when I am angry, sad, or heart-broken (yeah, I do get heart-broken). So, this piece is a piece of 'tahi' that is not worth reading.

I went to Tesco this morning with the hope that something interesting would come up to me (unfortunately, nothing happened). And I was in the state of buying every food that came into my mind. And trust me there were lots of food I was thinking of savouring. I was damn hungry and tired because my sleep last night took every ounce of energy I have saved for the last 22 years of my life (yes, i am exaggerating but I was really hungry, man). The day is Saturday and as a result, there were lots of people buying supply for their factory (again, exaggeration). I went for the fast lane to pay for the chemicals I'm going to damage my brain with but the fast lane was handled by some stupid people that made the fast lane..oh... so SLOW! And because I was so lack of sugar, I made faces and cursed them (not out loud. I'm too lemah lembut to be cursing people to their faces). The cashiers were laughing and drinking and sexing (again, exaggeration in the last verb). Patutla korg keje situ. I don't mean to be cruel but people; not me, have better things to do than seeing you guys laugh for something NOT funny at all and I; myself have to eat. And after buying the snacks, I went to the food court. All that I take is telur, ikan (sgt sedikit) n sayur (pun sgt sedikit). The rice given to me is also sedikit. I know that I ate a lot but even anorexic would agree that the rice is not enough for any human being. Oh, what I am trying to say is, all the 'sedikit's cause me RM 5.50. I ate them at 1.30 pm. The time now is 3 pm. I am very very hungry again and I think I am rotting to death. Sekian.

p.s: something sweet happened last night. 

The Elephant Side Of Me

My father once said that I have a memory of an elephant. I couldn’t help it. I just love to burden myself with what people say and do and will remember all the smallest details.

Here are the list of the things that people said/did that always made my day when I remember them

Mimi:

Tido mcm buaya

Jgn bermain dgn api (smbil ktawa xhengat dunia)

Hamper tertekan perkataan2 yg kejam (forget the exact words but something like that la)

Rosey:

Nah, simpan ni (sambil koyakkn jadual prlawanan Portugal – Euro 2004)

Hanya org lompat PTS je phm org lompat PTS

Ida:  

adik buncit!

Hanisah:

Keciknya pinggang awak!

Hadiah ni utk org yg plg sy syg

(although she is this sweet nice girl, she once played my lesbian partner 2 make my then bf jealous..not expected, huh?) 

  

(3 di bawah: perlu ke korg mndi brtiga di melaka dlu?haha)

Syirah:

Senang nk bela awk ni. Boleh mkn 1 lauk je

Hati awk lembut

Wani:

Awk muda tp matang

Awk akn slalu pkir bila ada msalah

(thanx 4 all da consolation u've given me. they are really helpful)

Diana:

Aku dh knal sgt ko ni, ko msti trlajak pnya (once I was driving really fast and almost terlajak but she reminded me to turn left before I even got there)

1^st time ko bg idea bernas (given to me everything I gave ideas.. and they are always the 1^st time..haha)

Klu jd kt ko aku tau ko pun akn byar balik sume duit diorg

Mcm pelik je dia ckp psl mati. Slalunya ko je yg ckp psl mati

(thanx so much 4 da help u've given me. i cannot ever repay)

(rumah taik)

(we were both chased by a dog, bought 2 rabbits n laughed like hell 2gther)

Udin: 

Cerek air

Lawa pah hri ni

Aslam:

Baik ko servis kete ko sblum balik Perlis. Hati2..

u rock woman. Thanx 4 every help that u’ve given me. Thanx 4 being my close friends.

Siti: Awk perhati sume bnda

Ahlam:

(you know what lam, there r not a single thing that I don’t like about u. u r such a calming person and it calms me. When u say something, it makes me reflect back on my life and most importantly, u make me listen)

Hazwan:

jgn risau, ko xgemuk

(he went out to fetch me and 2 other frens at 3 am and said that it is not appropriate for a girl to go out at night. A fren told me that he didn’t sleep that night)

(he once carry my bag for me)

Looi:

Here, spray this (when I was bleeding bcoz of : .........PACAT)

Zul:

I’m going to miss ur nose n ur ‘cerek’ air

(and all the things that u said that make me laugh)

Dalwin:

Mcm mna sni? Ok tk? Rndu rumah? (when we first arrived here. She said as if she’d been here 4 ten years..haha)

I’m always going to be there 4 u darling

Jom pergi Old Town

Thankx 4 being my hardworking partner

(4 the endlessly hugging my waist-so sweet… oh, and touching my boobs- is that necessary?)

(she took my picture with Abg Didi. Thanx 4 the help..hehe)

Puvi:

(she once belanja me KFC dinner plate)

Kak Farah:

Sharifah muda lg.. (hehe..thanx kak Farah but when u were 22, u can already cook excellently)

Ainnul:

Pedulikan apa org kata asalkn kita bahagia (sambil mengusap rambutku yg tebal- that’s so sweet ainnul)

Natrah:

Awk la kwn pompuan yg plg lelaki skali

Non:

Kesiannya ko Pah xbalik raya ni

Joe:

Ada innocence kt muka Sharifah (bila sume tnya npe xcye diorg,npe kna tnya Sharifah..hehe..thanx Joe)

(thanx 4 the fax thingy too)

Afik K:

Sjadjnjsdhfsdjcfnjxkl…. (I’m sorry. I just don’t understand the car language- the problems and instructions u’ve given me when NAV was sick)

And I remember every time people call me ‘adik’ because I feel like one and I need to act like one (refer to previous post-I don’t know anything and I need people 2 always guide me). 

All the help that they’ve given me might seem small but they are big and certainly meaningful to me.thanks 4 da wonderful moments u have given me, guys.

And then there’s  so much more but my brain seems to be not working at the moment as I’ve just damage it with Mamee Kari Xtra Pedas

AKU BUKAN PEREMPUAN ITU..

Aku xcntik, gemuk dan hitam

Aku xreti bersukan. 100 m pun xleh lg2 4 x 100m (xtau wujud ke tk acara ni)

Aku xleh mngacarakn ssuatu majlis (gugup weh)

Aku lurus sgt

Aku penuh dgn emosi (dan suka tmbah burukkn lg dgn dgr lagu sedih)

Aku suka Britney Spears sbb dia xkesah apa org ckp asalkn dia jd diri dia sndiri (dan lgu2 dia sgt fun n lain dri yg lain..listen 2 Blackout album)

Aku xpndai brgaul (msti muka aku xleh blah/ketat je)

Aku dh sah2 xleh memasak (Wani pnah trmkn kulit telur dlm telur dadar yg aku pecah n kacau-bkn masak ye)

Aku cenderung bt org lari dri aku (aku xtau apa msalah aku)

Aku slalu bt lawak yg aku xsdar dh sakitkn hati org lain

Aku seorg yg mmbosankn sbb aku akn pkir dlu apa aku akn ckp

 Sorg kwn aku pnah ckp: "Shepah ni la kwn pompuan yg plg laki skali"

Aku sgtlah pnas baran orgnya tp hanya kt org yg aku syg (n that includes u, my family.. i love u guys)

Kiranya aku ni bkn org yg laki bwk balik jmpa parents diorg la..hee..

tp.................

Aku akn sntiasa cuba baiki diri aku

Aku msih bleh fkir wpun aku terima je apa yg org ckp 

Aku still prempuan Melayu wpun gilakn Britney

Aku tau aku akn blajar memasak jgk suatu hri nnt

Aku bt lawak n ketawa utk smbunyikan perasaan sbenar aku (i'm sorry that my sense of humour is different. i don't mean 2 hurt anyone)

Aku bnyk diam kt org yg aku rapat tp aku still syg diorg (i'm sorry dalwinder kaur.u r my best fren but i cannot help it that i'm quiet and boring)

Aku msih sorg pompuan yg prlukn kwn pompuan utk menggila n kwn laki yg bleh dia ckp, share sume n pcaya)

Aku tau yg aku syg sgt kt family aku n org2 yg aku syg (dan bila aku syg org 2 aku akn syg sungguh2 n sggup bt apa je utk diorg)

kesimpulannya:

AKU BUKAN PEREMPUAN BIASA YG PERFECT DAN BLEH BT SUMENYER 

(sbar jela dgn aku ni)

Obssesive Compulsive Disorder (sje wat gempaq)

I have been in love with Britney Spears all my life. She is so not the person i am but wish that i could be

so here's the picture maps (i really need to stop reading storytelling!)

From this sweet bubbly small town girl.....

evolved to a beautiful person...

but still enjoying her life the way she wanted it to without worrying what others think of her...

with her family and loved ones...

 

and she found her 'princes charming' (or so she thought)..

but they turned out to be jerks, gave children to one of them and become one hell of a hot mama.....

and continue doing what she does best; being herself....

oh, and the crazy things she did......

makes me fall in love with her even more  

(i have been wanting to be bald since i was young but my parents won't let me. so i guess Britney fulfilled it for me..yay!).

There are more great photos and achievement of hers but i am tired now.. 

Yes, i know i may look lunatic to be adoring Britney like hell but hey, she is the other part of me i'm afraid to show.. and she isn't afraid to show it!

love ya, Brit muaxx

A little girl

there is this special little girl...

she is this girl that is so special i couldn't express it with words. when i think about her, i miss her, i long for her laugh (and her complaints because she has this special whining). 

everyone who knows her know that she is special but i don't think she realize it. people are crazy to stay friends with her and they get jealous easily if she befriended with someone else.

i may sound crazy but i love her (in a sisterly way). she makes me feel young and at the same time she makes me feel like i am old enough to be respected. i never liked a younger person before. all my life i have been the youngest everywhere and the thought of people younger than me makes me..hmm..how should i put this..i don't know..uneasy? 

but she is the only younger person that i love. not that because she treats me differently. it's just the way she is. she thinks she is normal with friends and family problems but she is not. i'm giving my guarantee that whoever meets her will fall in love with her immediately.

when i'm down, i think of the many wonderful things God has blessed my life with and one of it is her. i am thankful that i bumped into her when i think my life is going to be boring. she is just so different.. she makes my life interesting.

in short (very very very very short), this little girl is so special. this entry is a far cry from the real person i'm trying to convey. i'm doing her injustice real bad in describing her.

there are just so many wonderful things that can be said about her but that is all that i can say now because there are thousands of wonderful things about her that can be said that it kinda messed up the language area of my brain.

All Alone :(

UUM postponed the exam (really; the final exam)
everybody in Pala's house has gone to the comfort of their homes.. (shaz adnan, ainnul asyikkin bakri, siti khadijah, farah illiana azmi n nurul insyirah...enjoy ur time at home)
and i'm in this 'house' all alone with Beh Hue Ming as my neighbour..
i'm kinda bored now.. (i freakin need 2 study and watching Britney Spears' video won't help in the final...wake up sharifah)
too many things happening in my life now i cannot seem to sort them out (or write them down). wish i am still a child where Mama would settle everything for me and kaklong and kakngah would make my life a living hell. those were the times.. i miss those moments. i don't have to think about anything and my wishes would just be fulfilled..
damn..i should stop complaining and start studying

p.s: i miss u mama n kaklong n kakngah